Before a episode starts an opening comment will appear.
- Pilot: Drake and Josh introduces themself.
- Dune Buggy: Josh complains about how Drake always get away with everything while Drake eats cake with his hands, drinks milk straight from the carton, and wipes his hands on the curtains.
- Believe Me, Brother: Drake is dating a girl named Susan.
- Two Idiots and a Baby: Drake thinks Josh should cut loose and have more fun while Josh thinks Drake should be more responsible.
- First Crush: Drake has a skill for talking to girls, but Josh doesn't
- Grammy: Drake and Josh think that Audrey and Walter baby them despite being fifteen years old.
- The Bet: Drake and Josh talk about bets they did.
- Guitar: Drake nudged Josh complain about each other's sleeping habits.
- Movie Job: Josh loves doing work, but Drake doesn't.
- Football: Drake loves music and Josh loves cheese.
- Pool Shark: Drake hates how Audrey and Walter want him and Josh to spend time together, but Josh loves it so when he asks Drake if he wanted to take a cooking class together, Drake tries to convince Josh that he moved to Australia.
- Smart Girl: Drake talks about how Josh does really well in school and Josh talks about how Drake does really well at everything but school.