|Season 2, Episode 9|
|Air date||September 12, 2004|
|Written by||Dan Schneider|
|Directed by||Virgil L. Fabian|
Number 1 Fan
Driver's License is the ninth episode of the second season of Drake & Josh. It aired in September 12, 2004.
The episode begins with Drake and Josh talking about how being 15 was good, but they are more excited about being 16 due to being the age to get their driver's license. While Josh states he'll do responsible things, but Drake wants to do a few things with driving for his own enjoyment. Josh says that he can't wait to drive to the supermarket to buy melons. Drake then says that he likes grapes, and that he believes they are like tiny melons, but Josh denies this. They then end the segment by stating how they can't wait to drive.
The episode starts where both Drake and Josh are studying for their driver's test. Josh is reading a book, while Drake playing a video game, using a steering wheel controller. Josh tells Drake that he should be studying for their driver's test, and Drake claims that he is, although Josh questions if what happens in the game will actually be in the real test. Josh then tells him that they are becoming men (who drive), only for him to offer to play a very childish game. They then fight over who gets the purple controller.
The next day when they get home from school, Walter blows a whistle and he tells them that they failed to stop at the stop sign. He then says he's going to help them prepare for the test. Walter has set up a "simulator", using 2 chairs for the seats and a hula hoop for the steering wheel. Josh goes first and Walter tells him that a good driver should be prepared for anything, and he has Megan pretend to get in the way and get run over and then die. Megan gives Drake a wet willy after he says he gets to run over Megan next. Walter then gives them a warning that if either of them gets one traffic ticket, he will confiscate their licenses for good. During Drake's turn, Walter claims that they are driving along and that it's a beautiful evening and the sun is just about to set when suddenly, a thunderstorm hits, and he has Megan blast them with water pistols.
The next scene shows Drake and Josh at the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) with Josh saluting everyone, though Drake tells him to stop. Josh states that he is nervous but Drake tells him to stay calm, as good things happen when you remain calm. Drake's instructor turns out to be a hot instructor named Carly, and Drake claims that he remained calm and something good happened, but Josh questions why he always gets the hot ones, which Drake says he doesn't know, and tells Josh to try not to question it. Josh's instructor turns out to be a bitter, strict, serious and angry old woman. The scene then goes back and forth between them during their tests while driving. Josh is trying to get on his instructor's good side, but she continues to claim her hatred for teenagers. She then sees an ambulance and asks Josh why he isn't pulling over, and he says that he isn't legally allowed to pull over due to driving on a divided highway. His instructor states that he is correct, but doesn't like Josh's kind. We then see Drake's test, where it is shown that his instructor drew the side of his head. He then pulls into the drive-thru of Inside-Out Burger. Josh's instructor is complaining about the heat, so he offers to turn the A/C on and tries to roll her window up, but he crushes her arm as her arm was outside the window when he pulled it up. Drake bought his instructor food and she offers him a fry, but he states that he has to keep his hands on the wheel, so she puts a fry in his mouth. Josh has finished his test, and his instructor starts making hints that he failed. When Josh starts pleading with her to take it again, she reveals that he actually passed, much to Josh's delight. She then threatens to call the cops when he hugs her. Drake returns and his instructor says that the test was the most fun she has ever had, only for her to state that she can't pass him because he did a lot of things wrong on the test, including the fact that he ran four stop signs, he ran two red lights, drove on the sidewalk, rear-ended a firetruck, and that he almost ran over an old lady in a wheelchair. His instructor gives him her phone number and he scolds her about how much she owes him for the food, before the old lady in a wheelchair who he almost ran over during his test shows up and starts chasing him and yelling at him.
Later that evening, Drake is upset about not getting his license and Megan starts bugging him about it. Josh returns with the groceries that Audrey sent him to get since he can drive now. Drake knows that Josh must feel great having his license. Josh tries to deny it, but breaks saying he loves it and offers to get pizza, because they can. The next scene shows them in the car and Drake still can't believe that he failed and Josh passed. Josh tells him that he can't get everything by using his cool attitude and charm. Josh continues looking at Drake after telling him this, and Drake tells him he ran a stop sign, because he didn't keep his eyes on the road. Josh denies this until a police car pulls up behind them.
The officer comes to the car and asks Josh to step out of the vehicle. He states that Josh ran a stop sign and asks for his license. Josh is worried about the cop giving him a ticket, remembering Walter's warning. Drake tells him that he read about how some guy in Phoenix who got out of a traffic ticket by faking a heart attack, though Josh doesn't believe that since Drake doesn't read. The officer returns and sees that Josh's record is clean and he is free to go, but he still has to give him a ticket for running a stop sign. He then takes Drake's advice and starts faking a heart attack, but the officer can see right through it.
Back in their room, Josh is angry about having his license for one day and he already got a ticket, meaning that Walter will confiscate it. He tries to just rip it up right then and there, but he can't because its laminated. Drake claims that if Walter doesn't know about the ticket, he won't confiscate it, and Drake offers to pay it. Josh is grateful and asks how he can repay Drake, and he asks for a ride to the mall to get a new CD. When they're at the mall and Drake comes back, Josh reminds him he was in the mall for over an hour and that he said he was only getting a CD and he says that he also got a new pair of sneakers, a set of guitar strings and went to the pet store, where he got a Japanese biting fish and a squeaky chew toy for Josh, which Josh throws out the car window. Drake then decides he wants to go to Trevor's house, but Josh states that they are already late and can't. Drake then guilt trips Josh into taking him to Trevor's house by bringing up the fact that he paid for the ticket, so Josh asks where Trevor lives and Drake tells him to take a left at the stoplight. Josh starts staring at Drake again, so Drake says "stop sign" and Josh stomps on the brakes, only for Drake to claim that he was kidding.
Back in their room at bedtime, Drake wakes Josh, using his guitar and amp. He then tells Josh to drive them to get tacos, but it's 3 AM, which Drake likes to call it the "taco hour". Josh tells him to just go make some as they already have stuff in the kitchen. Drake then states that Josh should drive him since he saved his butt. Josh angrily gets up and starts telling off Drake for trying to take advantage of him, but Drake blackmails Josh into taking him to go get some tacos by threatening to wake Walter and tell him about the ticket, so Josh drives them to get tacos. At the premiere, Josh is waiting on Drake when Gavin comes over and asks Josh to scrape off a diaper in the bathroom, but it's his day off, so Gavin decides to leave it until the next day Josh is working. Drake then comes out with his date, and he and Josh decide to go home, only for Drake to spot another hot girl, who turns out to be a college student and he lies that he's also a college student and asks her out, to which she accepts and expects him to drive her to dinner, but he lies again that his family has a chauffer named "Chives" and she leaves Drake her number and will see him and "Chives" the next day. Gavin then comes out with the diaper that was stuck to the wall.
The next night, Josh is driving Drake and his date, wearing a chauffeur suit and cap, and he is annoyed that Drake made him do this. When they get to the restaurant, they leave Josh in the car while they eat and don't bring him any food. When Drake and his date come back, she decides that she wants a walk on the beach. Drake tells "Chives" to drive to the beach, but he refuses, stating that he is very tired and exhausted and the beach is almost a half hour drive. Drake once again threatens to tell Walter about the ticket, and Josh finally snaps and yells at Drake that he is tired of him holding that over his head and driving Drake around. He then confirms to Drake's date that he's his brother, not his chauffeur, and he climbs over into the passenger seat and states that Drake should drive if wants to go to the beach so bad, and decides that he will and climbs into the driver's seat. However, before he can even start the car, the cops appear again, much to Josh's delight. The officer (the same one from earlier) tells Drake that he has a taillight out and asks for his license and Josh reveals that he doesn't have one (much to his date's shock) and Josh reveals that it's the reason that he had to drive him around all the time, consequentially revealing to the officer that Josh was the one driving the car. He claims that he has to give Josh another ticket, but Josh claims that the cop has to give him 2 tickets, one for the faulty taillight and another one "for this" and he proceeds to beat up Drake in the car, while Drake's date flees the car.
- "Chives" is the name of a butler in The Amanda Show.
- This episode marks the first time that Drake or Josh drives (with the exception of Dune Buggy).
- This episode is the only one to feature Josh having his license.
- The woman who played Josh's driving instructor would later play Nona on Sam & Cat.
- Inside-Out Burger is a parody of In-N-Out Burger.
- In the episode, Steered Straight, Megan mentions a speeding ticket, but Josh wasn't speeding; he just ran a stop sign.
- She could've been referring to a different ticket.
- Those who just recently received their drivers licenses are not allowed to drive at night, so Josh was breaking the law by doing so.
- It is likely Josh knew this and did it anyway to avoid Drake conversing with Walter.